How to deal with suicide
Updated: Jun 1, 2019
DISCLAIMER: If you are going through this or know someone who is going through a difficult time in their life and could have suicidal tendencies or has even tried to commit suicide, here are a few short term things you can do to help as well as long term things that have personally helped me. If you are in real danger seek professional help such as black dog institute, beyond blue and Life line.
SHORT TERM HELP
GET HELP NOW: If in immediate danger, call a friend, someone you can trust or has been through the same thing to take you to the hospital or to the doctor, they have dealt with this sort of thing plenty of times and know what to do. A telephone crisis line like Life Line is very helpful; the person on the other end of the phone is like you, has been through their own turmoil and can give excellent advice and attention. RETRAIN YOUR BRAIN NOW: The negative thoughts that are going on in your mind right now are lying to you. You have been so used to talking to yourself in a negative way that you now believe it.
Well guess what? None of it’s true! Find your clarity and your real voice and keep telling yourself positive affirmations, such as, “I am safe, I am loved, I am worthy, I am good, I am beautiful, I am kind, I am loving, I am lovable, I am a good friend, I can heal, I am healing right now, I have plenty of time to heal” etc.
Anytime that negative voice comes in, say to yourself, “Is this thought helpful? Is this thought serving me? This thought doesn’t belong to me, it is not useful to me, I send it to the light”.When the feelings come up, notice them, feel them and let them go, over and over. You may have to do this 500 times and it can get frustrating, but keep at it. This is how you will beat this thing.BREATHE NOW: Keep holding on, 5 minutes at a time and slow down your breathing. Breathe in for 6 counts, hold for 4 seconds and breathe out for 8 seconds. Bring your breathe down into your stomach instead of your chest, bring it down and breathe through your stomach, keep doing this, you will notice you will feel more present and grounded.
LONG TERM HELP
DON’T DO NOTHING: Don’t do nothing and hope that it will go away; these things fester if left unattended.
SUPPORT: Find a support group, there will be a local one in your area. Find a psychologist and if you like, a spiritual healer or religious figure whichever you prefer and see them on a regular basis.
SHARE: Reach out to people who are going through the same thing, you may help someone by sharing the knowledge you have gained from your own experience. Contact a friend who will listen, not talk. You need to get whatever is inside- out. Open up, reveal what you are feeling, even if it is scary. Whatever it is is causing you to feel this way, you will need to process it by talking to a friend or psychologist, someone who will listen.
DIY LIFE-SAVING KIT:
Make or update your life-saving kit and pre-empt the next attack. In your lifesaving kit you will need the following:
A to do list that covers what to do in extreme cases, eg: Call a friend, or ambulance, breathe, retrain brain, etc. In fact print this list if that helps you.
A coping kit. Life Line has instructions for a coping kit online that is very useful; it indicates what threat level you are at right now, as well as what is causing you to feel this way.
A letter from a friend that says: “Call me if you are in trouble, I will come right away”, or something like that. It can even be a piece of paper with your friend or relatives name on it, anything that works for you.
Rubber bands for your wrist, put these around your wrists and flick them when you are having negative thoughts
A playlist ready to go, some favourite happy songs that you will connect with and feel safe with immediately.
A list of things you could do to distract yourself. When you are in this state, it is easy to forget anything that can help you, so write it down, it could be something like, wash the dishes, take out the trash, clean the fridge, brush your hair, anything).
Write down a list of things that you love, people you love, things you love to do, places you’d love to visit, write down your dreams, what you’d like to do in the future, doesn’t matter if it’s big or small
Write down your positive affirmations and say them out loud, make them your mantra. I am safe, I am whole, I am loveable, as well as reasons you are awesome, do you have a great laugh, are you a good friend, do you have a good heart, etc.
LET IT GO: Let it go, like the song. When you have gone through this, it is a sign to tell you something in your life needs to change immediately, something isn’t working, something is making you very unhappy. Whatever it is, however big or small, make a change. Let it go. Anything that is too hard say goodbye, make life easy, simple and let anything that feels constricted go.
SUPPORT FOR YOUR CHANGES: Find a support person, not just for if and when another attack occurs, but someone to help you get on your feet and support you through the big changes you have to make, whether it’s moving in with a friend or relative. If you don’t have this, speak to your psychologist about what you can do to have your choices for change supported in a safe way.